Dumb Things that People Say
I'm not sure if this would really be considered a full-out Rant, or more of a Satire/Making Fun of post.
Either way, I see no other place to put this and it kinda is a semi-rant about stupid people (or, at the very least, people who do/say stupid things) IRL.
I'm going to use this thread to post all of the "dumb things" people say/do at my work IRL.
As mentioned in my last Rant Threads, I work at a small grocery store (Retail).
So yesterday, I'm doing Delivery Day (we call them Truck Days) and I'm on stock as I always am (I do both Cashier and Stock) on Mondays and Thursdays.
Anyways, I'm stocking something... brownie mix I believe... and this older lady walks up to me, and she says:
"Are you familiar with the store? I bet you are, you're stocking stuff."
I literally... froze.... for a split second as a plethora of snarky things went through my mind, but I forced myself to be polite as I always do. I barely manage to mumble out a 'yeah' while I continue to mull over how dumb that statement is.
Picture a guy standing at a shelf, holding a brown box in his left hand, pulling items out of said box and putting them on a shelf. He's wearing black denim pants, a collared shirt and an older well-worn green apron, complete with nametag. Gee, you think he might be an *employee* there? I wonder....
Anyways, after my mumbled 'yeah', she goes:
"Do you have anything for... well... you know... cough drops?"
I'm thinking something like this: Well, gee. Grocery Store? Check. Middle of Winter? Check. Of *course* we have cough drops. Everyone else does too. But, this is a customer here; I really shouldn't be a Deadpan Snarker, especially not to a customer. Gotta be polite. I say:
"Yeah, they're back in the office where you get the lottery tickets."
Now, a small bit of background about our particular store: We have a 6-aisle store in a small town along a major US Highway. The location is very good for us, and we do a ridiculous amount of business, all things considered, which is very good for us. The new boss (he took over in 2001) has been very smart, in expanding our merchandise. Anyways, he moved all of the HBA items (Health-and-Beauty Aids) to the office, which is a separate room past the cash registers.
Said room contains all HBA stuff, along with Lottery, Movie Rentals, and of course, documents, files, computers, and most importantly, Money. Hence why the door is always closed and locked when no employees are watching the room. There's also a large yellow 8x11 computer paper sign with big black letters that reads: "Ask a cashier to ring for manager." and a white sign saying "For Customer Service, ask Cashier for help".
Wouldn't you know it, not more than 5 minutes later, same woman walks the whole way across the store, walks up to me and goes:
"Do I have to break in to get in there or something? What do I gotta do?"
First thing that comes across my mind (I don't say it of course) is "Yeah, ok, I'll get my crowbar, teach you the ins and outs of breaking and entering, and as a bonus I'll even throw in "how to wear handcuffs fashionably" and "how to get in and out of a police cruiser while wearing handcuffs" while I'm at it.
Arrrgh!
There are two BIG signs with BIG BLACK LETTERS with explicit instructions on what to do if the door is closed and locked. Honestly. But I suppose that requires reading.... ahem.....
So I say to her (quoting the sign, verbatim):
"Please ask a cashier to ring for manager."
And she walks away.
Later on, I was telling one of the cashiers this story and I go "One of the few things I simply love about this job is it makes me feel like Einstein considering some of the customers and a few of our workers..."
Frith-Rae BridgeSol
) and asked, "Do you work here?" 
(:rolloccularorbs: 
Originally Posted by velveeta
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