What in the world happened to courtesy?

[Radier]

This is my personal experience on Chaos shard, although I'm certain the good folks on Order have had their fair share...

I'm not an overly chatty player and I'm not a nasty player. If someone asks for help there is an excellent chance I'll drop what I'm doing to assist. Tough mob? Okay. Hunting comps? No problem. Need a portable silo? I'll grab my disk.

That being said, there are a LOT of players on Chaos, both old and new, who see no reason to thank others for their assistance. No appreciative nod, no words of thanks, not even a friggin "please" will escape them. I thought thanking others, for taking time out of their play to help you, was commonplace! Silly me, this is the Internet, anonymity means people can be uncouth hounds!

No wonder some players focus inward, there is zero appreciation when they go out of their way to assist others!

*deep breath* Whew, I feel better...

[LOVWYRM]

Radier,
its not only chaos,
its not only internet,
its not only about "Please" and "Thank you"
its not only about "offering a finger-get your arm thrown out.."

its about what we allow others to do with us,
its about how we allow others to treat us.
And when to stand up against.

I still expect the best-
but I am prepared
and rdy to draw conclusions.

[Racktor]

It is mostly on the Chaos shard that I hear these things happen, but it happens occasionally on Order... it's not fun. I try to lend a paw the best I can, but when someone doesn't say thank you or offer any common courtesy, I often try to avoid them and deny to help them further unless they start to learn manners.

There are still many good people in the game, as it's prized for its wonderful community, but it's sad that the minority can spoil it for some people.

[AguaRush]

I have seen this happen lots of places its not just istaria. People in general don't say please or thank you now a days... it's terrible. Call me a grumpy vet but if someone doesn't use polite manners with me I will remind them to do so, if they refuse or act ungrateful my help goes else where.

Only thing you can do (which may change the person or may not) is lets say they say
"Could you help me do >insert action<?"

I generally reply, "Sure how can I help you, but don't forget to use your manners, they mean a lot to players around here."

Sometimes I help the player first and then if they don't say thank you I may throw in something like "Your welcome for the help, don't forget to return the favor to others in need, and to say thank you. Also don't hesitate if you need more help send me a tell."

Something along those lines. Complaining about it won't fix it (but I totally understand your vent we all feel that way sometimes and I for sure don't always respond politely, I'm not perfect.) But try my suggestions it will help! It's our responsibility to teach others.

[Kyala]

yeah, it can be a little downer to have that happen, i see it plenty on chaos. at least however, it is just the minority. i'm always happy to lend a paw, many times over for those that take time to write those kind few words :P but, as for the rest, it would usually be a once-off thing now. as i have always put others before me, it's not much asking a little appreciation

i can agree with agua though, they just need some guidence, courtesy can go a long way

[Myrdiatoken]

I find that some vets are unwilling to help newer players now. This might be a reason, but I've only ever found it on Chaos or Order. I've never had this problem on Blight. But that's probably because so few of us actually exist. xD

[Meredas]

What really does my fins in is the swathe of new hatchling players who simply use /who to look up any ancient dragons around, then send them short, sharp tells asking for help.

'hi can u help' seems to be a common greeting nowadays!

Needless to say my response is always a stony silence, but I wish I didn't have to feel the urge to go invisible to avoid being singled out by those who want to be carried in this game. :T

[Racktor]

Usually if I get a 'can you help?' tell, I ask what it is... if they're asking for a bit of sandstone for that last little craft level, sure! If they're asking for 100 levels of adventure or craft... that's met with a cold no. I don't usually ignore them, unless I'm AFK or actually have something against the person. :P
And Myrdiatoken, most people on the Order shard that I know of (namely Luvwyrm, especailly!) love to help. I'm generally busy on my alts, though. Sorry to hear people didn't offer a paw and/or hand. :c

[LungTien Temeraire]

I have seen worse things than "hi can you help", getting only silence as reply is among these things. I think we shouldn't judge a new player so fast, just by this single sentence. But I won't say much more there, since this matter has been debated in several older topics, and I won't repeat my thoughs about this.

[meepsa]

one bad apple spoils the bunch.

some people might know/remember that I used to be a very friendly and helpful player, but that was back in the days when roughly 3/4 of the new players knew common courtesy. recently it seems like the numbers reversed and now only 1/4 of the new players aren't actually out to just fly and actually TRY to learn the game.

I think that ever since my kindness became too much and people started abusing it that I've grown a lot colder to new players, nowadays I only help those who are friendly and know atleast a bit about the game. that is, IF I can be bothered to even be online.

now this is just how I feel yaknow, not trying to start a flame war.

[Darkwing_Duck]

I usualy always drop what ever I`m doing to help fellow Istarians. unless they`re asking for power leveling, or in one instance "Please log into my character and level them to adult" :O Heck NO!! That`s when I go inviisable from said player. But I always get that sharp tell "Hi can you help" mostly when I`m on as Reagle, or my level 30 cleric Couger. Most times I`ll ask Sure! whatcha need? and if it`s reasonable like heal them while they finish a quest, or tell them where a certain NPC is, even show the way as many don`t know the world of Istaria when the`re just starting out Reagle loves giving tours when he can. Just as long as the player doesn`t expect me to take them to every town, I`ve already told a few off telling them they need to explore so they know where what is. >.>

[Hoberton]

Thought I would weigh in on this topic. I am hestitant anymore to help new players for quite a few reasons. So many ask for help that are level 100 and have been PLvd in such a short time and have no clue how to play this game. Others again level 100 (bipeds) and have not done a single bit of crafting and only ask for help when they find out they need the crafting part to build up a plot. Most of these level 100 players (other lower level players also) are invisible from searches and I would like to know a bit more about them before I lend my help to them, even when I ask them to become visible they do not. These same players, for the most part, become rude when they are told that they can get the item or whatever they need on their own. They only want freebies because that is all they know from playing in this game because of PLving.

I have gone out of my way to help so many players, most of what I do is not advertised in the MP. I do all of the help in private messages when the help is needed. I do not give in to demands from these new players. I only ask that these players do a bit of their own needs before even asking in the channels.

[Malicore]

as far as whether or not they want to craft isn't really a question here. the game is set for ppl to either be hunters/crafter and or both if they so choose. if they do not want / or can not help with what they need crafted/built, set a price before helping them. i care not if they choose not to be crafters, it's not for everyone. and can be quite boring. as far as plvlrs, prepare to pay for services rendered. or at least offer to pay for what you want/need. i have given simple stuff, i also put some things for sale on augh connie now and again. but after a few times of building up plots for ppl, to have them quit a short time later, i will no longer build for anyone for free.

so if you want help, make sure you start saving your cash early, as most ppl will not work for free, as many have in the past.

though i must say, i have never "not" been thanked for helping, or offered payment, even though most times i refused the payment, unless it was a time consuming job..

i will also no longer help with community projects. since last few i seemed to be the only one doing any of the work. when others are reaping the benefits from it.