My son was browsing the forums on wow

[Peaches]

Thought I would share this with you all:

If you play an online game that you enjoy, there's one surefire way to spoil the experience: read the forums on the official site. There you will find a vast underworld of lost souls keening their misery onto your screen. A game you thought was entertaining, well-balanced and attractive will be torn apart before your very eyes and pronounced lacking in every conceivable way.

It doesn't matter that the complainers spend as much time on the game as you do, and probably more. While they may disagree on the nature of the flaws, they are united in agreement that whatever those flaws may be, they are unforgivable.

Herewith then, a guide to the deranged, degraded inhabitants of the forums. You cannot defeat them, they provide precious little experience, but if they get their claws on you, they may turn you into one of their own.

The Power Craver

Wants only one thing -- more power with less effort. Any downgrade in power is infuriating. Any upgrade is insufficient.

Sample Quote: "I can't believe they nerfed the pillar of lava spell! How am I supposed to kill twelve ogres at once now?"

Punishment: Forced to admit that no matter how powerful in the game, still works as a cashier at Kroger in real life.

The Magical Realist

Doesn't understand what a "game" is. Constantly makes arguments based on what would be "realistic," even if the game is set in a fantasy world run by wizards and pixies.

Sample Quote: "You can't tell me a Mondlagarian Tiger Warrior is stronger than a Swamp Troll. That just doesn't make sense!"

Punishment: Sent back to kindergarten for remedial make-believe classes.

The Majority Stockholder

Seems to believe that $15 a month buys you a seat on the board of directors. Doesn't realize that a hundred thousand other people are ponying up the same amount.

Sample Quote: "I've e-mailed the developers several times telling them that Fire Paladins should have the axe-throwing skill. They haven't changed it, but they're still taking my money!."

Punishment: Forced to work customer service for an online game company.

The Emancipator

Sees the game as a titanic struggle between the evil expressive developers and the poor, downtrodden gamers. The evidence? Every rule and limitation in the game.

Sample Quote: "I don't see why I have to complete quests to get epic weapons! If I want my second-level Bumblefur Bard to wield the Deathsword of Arat'rak'k'k'k, that's my right! Quit telling me how to play!"

Punishment: Sent to Sudan to experience first-hand what oppression actually feels like.

The Eternal Quitter

Just comes on the forum to let everyone know he's quitting for good and to spend a dozen paragraphs explaining why. Then does it again three months later.

Sample Quote: "For real, this time."

Punishment: Forced to actually quit.

One-Issue Poster

Only has one complaint, but posts about it 15 times a day. This is because nobody else cares.

Sample Quote: "THE LAVENDER STARBELT IS ACTUALLY PERIWINKLE!!!! WHY DON'T THEY FIX THIS??!!!?!"

Punishment: Lavender Starbelt changed to lilac.

The Lifestyler

Wants a bunch of cosmetic changes to a single type of character. Exhibits an eerie level of identification with said character.

Sample Quote: "The Pastry Elves' laugh should be less bubbly and more tinkly. Our giggle should remind you of gazing at the stars as a child, and our smile should make you think of the taste of honey on a cool spring morning."

Punishment: Character icon replaced with accurate photograph of self.

The Deathmonger

Main complaint about the game is that you can't kill everything. Secondary complaint is that the things you can kill don't suffer enough.

Sample Quote: "Why can't I make the baker watch me kill his wife and child, then force-feed their flesh to him until his stomach bursts? What is this, Barbie's Horse Adventure?"

Punishment: To be determined, pending DNA analysis of freezer contents.

Heh, pretty interesting, eh?

[Eileen Mavourneen]

Heh, I recognize every single one of those ...

[Imayo]

LMAO, I love that one. Can I put that on my site?

[snickel]

What a fine and life-like cast of characters!

And I must say the punishments, though sometimes very cruel ('customer service') appeal to the lowest and meanest revenge motive in me....

[Xante]

nice post peaches !

Think I can add one :

The " I am a idiot " type

When a poster asks something serious in regard how to improve his game of tries to find an answer to his problem, the others reply :

Quote: L2P or L2R or reroll PVE , PVE server that way --->

Punishment: send them to school to learn respect and how to express them selves in a decent adult way

[Peaches]

It would be nice to see it on our forums!

Heh, Xante

[vahrokh_the_ancient]

Well, the WoW posters are a cesspool of bad and immature spoiled specimen of human beings.

Being many millions it's easy to get the oddest examples out there.

Said that, it's the price to pay to have an almost "free" forum, where everyone can voice what they think about unless they really go heavy.

But there are propositive and positive posters as well.

http://forums.wow-europe.com/thread....14551795&sid=1
"Sahrokh's guide on playing multirole in raids"

is my sticked guide about a class dealing with raids.

You seemed to forget there are positive posters there as well, and that there's always something good even under the thickest mud.

Horizons has not the exclusive on it.

[snickel]

Vahrock,

my take on that post was not that it was intended as a defamation of the wow forums, but that those forums, due to the fact that so many gamers are active there, provide a large sample of posts which is a prerequisite to categorize posters into types.

I am convinced that these types show up in every online game forum and are no indication of the quality of the community of the specific game.

To charcter-type bothersome posters is just fun, a way to come to terms with it and see the lighter side.

[Hawkman007]

*casts Ressurect* LOL! i'm the one that would fit into the Emancipator spot but the Example is kinda off.

[Magnus Bane]

Don't forget the ones who are always asking for help, even when it is easy to do.

[Hawkman007]

oh yeah.....but my Cleric IS helpless Q _Q

[velveeta]

i can be and have been all of these......

[Frith-Rae]

****..Res thread is resurrected!!

Interstingly enough with this rezzed thread today, Blizz announced they are shifting to forcing people who post to post with their RL first and last name's displayed (to be implemented shortly before caty hits - also being implemented on the Starcraft forums when it launches).

To "cut down on forum trolling" HA! I'd say "cut down on the use of forums entirely" is what they'll get.

Brilliant /not

[velveeta]

how are they gonna know if you are using your real name? its not like anyone is gonna fork over their driver's license or social security numbers....

velveeta dufromage is the most they would get from me, i can tell you that much

[Raptress]

how are they gonna know if you are using your real name? its not like anyone is gonna fork over their driver's license or social security numbers....

velveeta dufromage is the most they would get from me, i can tell you that much

Heheh.. Well, if you ever played, pray that you never run into a support issue. Blizzard requires that the information you provide is not falsified and can close accounts that break their rules at their discretion. And doubly pray that you never get your account "hacked" as getting it back requires that you fax them identification to prove you are the real owner of the account.

[Steelclaw]

Brilliant!

Now their players will move to other forums where Blizzard has no control over the content and no PR influence.

I wonder if this move runs afoul of COPPA (Children's Online Privacy Protection Act)...

[Thicklesip]

People are already trying to sic the ESRB on them. And, y'know, forum post to the effect of "NO, JUST NO" a mile and a half long almost instantly. Though, everybody I talked to didn't look like they'd bother posting against it, we just cancelled our subs.

I really do smell some upper exec meddling. Or, at least, I hope I do. Seems like actual gamers or devs would understand why this would be a bad-bad-WOAH-bad idea.

[Frith-Rae]

Brilliant!

Now their players will move to other forums where Blizzard has no control over the content and no PR influence.

I wonder if this move runs afoul of COPPA (Children's Online Privacy Protection Act)...

No because if you have set up a parental account over the child's account you can make it so that they can never post in the forums (or add friends via the in game RealID system); thereby never revealing said information.

And honestly Blizz rarely enforced any type of moderation (or PR influence on topics) otehrwise on the content - hence why the claimed reason is the "trolling."

When you know if the moderators had been doing their job from the start the trolling wouldn't be an issue *snorts*.

And yea Vel its the RL name you put on your private account info. Stuff that you can't fake - or at least - you can only fake if you only play the game via prepaid game cards.

I'm not cancelling my subs though, I just won't post. I go there mostly to read and since this will probably get rid of all the posts that do provide information; I'll stick tot he non-official forums like I do mostly now . If you never post, information won't get displayed. Just a stupid move IMO and something they can still alter to acheive the same "supposed" results of reducing trolling and setting up a more accountable community.