The preceding post has been rated INET-S for satirical content and is not suitable for viewing by the humor-impaired. All rites reversed. Prosecutors will be violated.
- I am not allowed to announce my presence by booming “I am born Shiva the Destroyer, Death, the Shatterer of Worlds� to the entire server.
- “Behold the Metatron, Herald of the Almighty and Voice of the One True G*od!� is not acceptable either.
- I am not allowed to give the gift of Salt Rock Bonus, even if a player does have unused stacks in their inventory.
- Changing the text on the female fiend’s ‘Warcry’ emote to “Me love you long time!� is not an improvement.
- Pretending to be a Smurf when logged on to Order is not roleplaying.
- Neither is pretending to be Smurfette, even if I do have the dress and hair bow.
- Smurfs are not one of the Living Races of Istaria and using /setscale on anyone playing a fiend is not a proof-of-concept.
- The proper reply to a bug report is, “Please submit a trouble ticket on that issue,� not “That’ll cost you $20.00 for pizza and a picture of your sister.�
- I am not allowed to script Nadia to do the /ride emote whenever a player buys something from her.
- No portion of either the RoP or the ARoP involves a snipe hunt in the Staging Grounds.
- I am not allowed to script the Sslanis guards to say “BUD� “WEIS� “ER� in a constant loop.
- I am not allowed to produce & distribute a line of “Dryads Gone Wild� DVDs.
- Forcing every female character’s endowment slider to maximum is not a bug fix.
- I am not allowed to certify anything as “Functioning as Intended�.
- I am not allowed to sell commercial advertising space on dragon butts.
- SoG does not drop the Epsilon-Zeta Baton of Instant Ancienthood, and I must not tell brand new hatchies that he does.
- There is no such thing as the Death Point Fairy.
- I am not allowed to replace Lady Kendra’s dialog with the lyrics for “It’s Raining Men�.
- The Saris do not need a “Hairball� emote.
- I am not allowed to tell new players that El Caliente’s wife is named Mother Clucker.
- I am not allowed to make the Hermit aggro on hatchlings who mess with his lava pool.
- I am not allowed to make the name ‘Crankenspank’ any more entertaining than it already is.
- I am not allowed to create any event that involves the words “toga party�.