Runic Suicide

[Kaerisk]

I am only a third of Maekrux.

I am the Runic – a failsafe left in case of an Aegis invasion. I carry within me the mind of Maekrux Vythulhar, his will to help his kyn, and his reason. I am without flesh; my body is comprised of little more than lines of runic words strung together in the shape of a dragon. Had all worked as it should have, I would have been all of Maekrux. But they did not.

This is the story of my suicide.

[Kaerisk]

I initially was concerned when a close friend of mine, Amethyr, was no longer speaking to me and was going behind my back. I knew she had created a copy of me; indeed, after announcing to the Council of my status as a miasma, the then-hatchling had come under my control. It wasn’t to undermine me that she did this. She had no idea that my runic trap also served to save my life. However, when she continued to act suspiciously, I grew concerned. Would my kyn be able to accept me as a miasma?

It wasn’t until she finished her work that I learned the truth. She had created a fourth part – a spirit most confused, not even thinking it was Maekrux, but Resurgam, who never existed at all. I was shocked and horrified. Not only was I incomplete, my body parts were being used to fashion abominable dolls. I quickly acted, taking the creature within me, and began to unravel and absorb it. It took time, but once complete I was certain of where my parts lay – and where to find them.

The first I had to find was the feral. It had grown suddenly, a backlash of magic from the resurrection perhaps, it is hard to say. In changing its body so quickly, it became a slave to it, attacking my own son and vying only for territory and meat. I tracked it down to the Vandus March. Amethyr had already done so earlier to create the amalgam; all that was left was the empty shell, his soul already a part of me. However, that flesh also contained memories, locked away by feral devices. In order for Maekrux to be restored, I had to capture him.

The Feral immediately roared out a challenge as I landed in his territory. I began by lifting my wings and drawing lines in the dirt. He began to approach, blood on his mind, eyes burning with feral anger. As I finished the last of my runic symbols he leapt upon me, his teeth attempting to rend the flesh I did not have. I held solid, but my glowing lines snapped, sending out a jet of runic energy. It pulled back and I retreated over the lines. It followed immediately upon recovering. Placing my claws to the circle, I activated it, a powerful shock overtaking the Feral’s systems. It paused only a moment and so I had to shock him again, and again, until he at last collapsed within the circle.

With some effort, I was able to drag the Feral back to Harton Valley. There I placed runes of binding upon the floor of my foyer and left him. I would need to seek out someone who could help me transfer into him. I could not ask Amethyr; she had already lost so much over this matter. I turned to Runos, who I thought would be willing to help me.

After explaining the situation, I brought her to the lair. My glowing form was leaking runic energy from the wound. "Inside is my body. It has gone feral. It is currently being held by runes of binding. The merging circle has already been written, but I need your strength to power it."

Runos nodded. “Okay. I will be happy to add a little strength to it. Shall we?�

I nodded. "Thank you. If I did so now, my own form my rupture before the merging was complete." We quickly stepped into the lair. The Feral thrashed angrily against the runes of binding. I came to stand on his left while Runos came to his right, sitting up to free her front claws.

The circles began to glow as I placed my forepaws to it. Piece by piece, line by line, the circles and runes below the feral begin to flow. The feral thrashed madly against the binding as the lights began to rise below him.

“This is a sad sight... a feral one,� she said, making a few gestures and lightly touching the feral's scales. “To thrash may alter this... and so I bid you to sleep for a while...� It formed a rune that calmed it, relaxed it, and made it feel like sleeping. The feral shuddered and then stopped thrashing, resting weakly against the ground.

I saw that Runos was ready and nodded to her. I locked my claws against the outer circle and explained, "I'm going to channel myself into the body now and displace the feral. So long as the power is maintained until the feral wakes, all should go according to plan." Runos turned and, with a few more gestures, prepared some extra energy to siphon into the ritual. She nodded that she was ready. I released my soul from the Runic Shell, which remained in place, filtering its energy into the ritual. My soul entered into the circle and began to be channeled into the form. Runos focused on the runic forms of the ritual, feeling out the energies, and worked to keep them stable while my soul entered into the feral's body. It was easy since Amethyr’s earlier work had left it without a soul. It shuddered and shook violently for a moment as the Runic Shell collapsed and fell apart, the energy of the ritual now only maintained by Runos.

Runos felt a bit more dissonance in the patterns. She pushed more energy into the ritual to keep it constant. Taking a deep breath to offset the great drain on her, she seemed to draw magic energy from invisible, natural flows in the earth that ran powerfully through the lair. The feral body opened its eyes and gasped for air a moment. The runes below it turned red and then slowly faded into the body.

I blinked and shook my head. It was supremely odd to be in flesh again, to feel the sensation of the cool ground, the buzz of the energy. You don’t notice just how important your body is until you don’t have one. "Thank you, Runos. Only one step remains," I said.
Runos nodded. "Anything for one of dragonkind who requires aid. What is our last thing?"

I slowly stood, still shaking my head. The memories of everything that the feral had done, everything I had learned, rushed together and merged and weighed on my heart. Now I felt it. "I.. I have lost my second son."

Runos tilted her head. "Er, my... that is not a good thing... to lose family..."

I shook my head. Runos did not need to see my suffering. "There - there's nothing that can be done just yet. I don't have the third part. I thank you kindly for your help though."

“Well, if you recall it... please call upon me,� she said. I agreed and she added with a little smile, "At least the bonding of Tsargoth and Shian will be coming soon... Perhaps I will see you there too?"

This was new information. “Their.. bonding.� I muttered. I lowered my head. "I will be there."

Runos nodded and smiled. "Okay. See you there Maekrux. If you need me... my lair is the flamesong cavern of Dralk."

I returned the smile lightly, for her benefit. "Again, I thank you Runos." She nodded and bid me farewell.

I now had flesh again. It was a strange sensation, after being without it so long. Worst of all, I could feel that I had wronged my family and those who had wronged me. Once again, I was abandoned in my hour of need and left to the mercy of near-strangers. Was a dragon’s life always to be one of solitude and pitiless regret? Now that the Feral was dead, I pitied his loss. He felt no pain, wrapped in his blissful ignorance.

[Kaerisk]

The next step would be harder. In her sagacity, Amethyr had moved the Hatchling to the Realm of Fire, which sustained him better than the Rift. He had Maekrux’s curse of the Rift and had faded there upon hatching. Getting him out so he could complete Maekrux would not be easy and, to be honest, I wasn’t sure if it was a good idea. The Hatchling may have had all of Maekrux’s determination and will, his strength of heart and his love for his family and kyn, but he also would prevent Maekrux from having children again. There was also the matter of my own survival. Upon merging with him, I would cease to exist and Maekrux would be restored.

I remembered something the SombreNeige told me about the egg. When it had phased out, it took a part of her claw with it, as she had tried to hold onto the hatchling. I called upon her help. Taking her to the shrine chamber, I activated the runes that made the cavern ceiling and walls seem to vanish, replaced by an endless expanse of black and stars. I traced a runic symbol in the air and then I guided Sombre’s hand to the symbol. It, in turn, guided me to the claw.

The star in question expanded rapidly until we fell into the burning flame. In reality, we had not moved. Space had and now was wrapped around our Shrine-chamber bubble. The Hatchling was in play with other hatchlings, yet to be born. Upon seeing the bubble, the other hatchlings fled, but the Hatchling must have felt something familiar about it. He wore Sombre’s claw on a mithril chain around his neck. He strode up to the bubble and looked at us through it. “Why have you come here?�

“Because you are incomplete, as am I. Maekrux Vythulhar is still needed in Istaria.�

“Is he still wanted?� the hatchling asked. I did not know how to answer. “I know who and what I am, part-of-me-not-me. I contain within me the spirit of Maekrux that never gives up. I am the Phoenix. When Maruger tore us apart, he took me first.�

“If you never give up, then why should it matter if he is wanted or not?� I asked.

“I see you contain his sense of reason. Up here I have seen things. The loneliness of the Sleeper. The love that Drulkar never showed Maekrux. Why should I return to that world, if you are the voice of reason?�

“Because you do not belong here. It has nothing to do with the gods or with us. It is about a dragon who is still important to his world.�

“No. Maekrux is all but forgotten in his world. Still, you have bested me at another point. I will not take my life at the expense of another’s. When his time comes, the Phoenix will finally rest here. Open the path.� I did so, letting the bubble open and the hatchling to step inside. As the fabric of space pulled away from the chamber, returning it to Istaria, I pondered his words. I had nothing to truly live for save survival. Would Maekrux?

With Sombre watching, The Phoenix and I came to the foyer. I drew the circles that would be needed. The Phoenix shed his blood into them, as did I. He stepped inside and turned his back to me, placing his claws on the center, waiting for me to do the same. I hesitated. Why should I martyr myself for a martyr? None would appreciate my sacrifice, nor would any truly understand what Maekrux had to go through in order to be reborn when not even ashes remained. I turned and place my claws onto the circle, activating it. I would not martyr myself. I would merely commit suicide. Let Maekrux deal with his life; I will have no part of it.

This is my suicide. Maekrux is reborn again.

[RuneDragoon]

Mae's back...

[Guaran]

Nice story, well told.

[Myrra]

Nice end to the story