The memoires of Talika

[Nyya]

*The writing on the page is incredibly scratchy and hard to read*

"Me hope this goes good...have seen Mama scratching on stuff before. Me ask Mama what she doing and she say it so she can write memories so not to forget. It did sound interesting, so me decided me will keep own journal. Not much me want to say right now, except me hope me can read own scratchings...me getting pain in head from trying to, so me will stop here and practice with air pressure lessons again."

[Nyya]

*The writing on the page is a little better than before, but it's clear that the author still needs to work on her writing*

"Me have made some new friends since escaped from bad humans. They is Greenflame and Iseia, and have learn that they love play too. I like play! Working all time be making me tired. Speak of new friends...that Drysten...Mama say me should not talk to him much, say that he keep slaves for one called Azu!

Not like that! Me was slave to bad humans before I died and awake on Skalkaar place. Drysten say that there nothing wrong with it because he say they is treated like royalty and they happy. No...it still wrong...slavery bad...not matter if slaves happy or not. Me should know!

Much as disagree with Drysten about slavery, he not seem like such bad Dragon...Me know how Mama feel about him...but me can't help but feel Mama might be...oh no...not will say that..."

[Nyya]

"Everywhere me go me am seeing Drysten...is like he following me...or me am somehow following him...there something scary about that.

Me am trying hard to respect mama's wishes, but it seem to be getting harder...me am torn...

Me did try to talk to mama and get her to try and stop chasing after Azu...mama say she doing it because she want me to have safer world to run and play in...she say me not should be afraid for her, but how can not be afraid? Zarla is best thing that ever happen to me...I not want to have choose between mama and Drysten, but she say me may have too...but...me just...can't...it not seem right...

Mama...please...me am scared...not want to lose you"

[Nyya]

*The ink is only half visible, and teardrop marks cover this page, blotching the remaining ink, so it is very hard to even begin to read this*

"...Me almost lost mama today...ME ALMOST LOST MAMA!! What could have possibly happen to make mama want to go and join Aegis?! Me was scareder than me have ever been in whole life...

Why mama?! How could even think of leaving and becoming enemy?! Is it because me did play with Drysten in clearing with Iseia? Is it because me did disobey mama and associate with Drysten after she tell me not to?

*The writing here is completely washed out from Talika's tears. The page ends with a single line at the very bottom*

"If other elders had no been there to make mama come to senses...me would have lost mama to aegis forever...thank you Drulkar...not can thank You enough for sending other elders to save mama from herself..."

[Nyya]

*The writing on the page is much more clear than the previous entry, but work still needs to be done*

"Not much have happened today. Elder Vyrry and me have not left mama's side since crisis last night. Me think mama is feel better, but me am still a little afraid. Must make sure such idea as leave and join Aegis never enter mama's head again...

It feel strange this...me know Aegis pure evil but...when mama was saying she was leaving to join them and trying to get me to let her go...me not quite know...but, part of me felt, if not could talk mama out of joining Aegis, then me would go with her...why that? Why? Not should be having those thoughts...me wonder if it because me never knew birth mama...never knew the love me now feel for mama Zarla. Me wonder if me have thought to go with mama to join Aegis...because that way she not leave me behind...me would still have mama...would still be together.

Uhh...me am getting head pain again, so must stop now. Night night."

[Nyya]

*The first page of this entry of just a series of letters going all the way through A to Z two times. This writing is much cleaner than before, and the actual entry begins on the second page*

"It seem that me worries have no longer meaning! When me did talk with Drysten few days ago he said mama was being coward. He say mama was doing wrong to me by making me choose between leave Istaria with her and stay here. Me was feeling trapped...

Drysten suggest me stay here and that me make up stories of mama since what me would write be what me remember about mama if she left. It seemed like good idea at time, but then me realize that me would be lying to self, even though would not realize it. Drysten say that me should write down all the good things about mama so me would have happy memories of her...wait, me already mention this...anyway...me was feeling trapped...seemed no matter what me did me would end up losing something. Even if me took Drysten's advice...me would still be without mama, me not want that, me want mama here with me.

Last day however, things did change and look better much! Mama tell me that she decide to stay in Istaria and form new order! She call it "Children of Drulkar", and she say that it will be group that heads return of Dragons to glory of old! That we grow to become Dragons that Great Drulkar be proud of! Mama say we will turn Lake Moyo into place where Dragon and Biped live together in peace, no longer at odds! Mama Zarla say that Lake Moyo will be place where hatchies can run and play together without fear of being attack by evil doers, and that elders like elder Nyya and her mate will watch over and protect us and be good example to all!

Me am so happy! Mama is staying here! Me not worry no more! If that not enough, mama did give me big pointy thingy that she call "stylus" and say it is proper writing tool. Me am using it right now, and me writing already so much better thanks to mama's lessons! It seem right now that all is right with me world!"

[Nyya]

*This journal entry is another one beginning with a random series of letters, and the writing seems to be even better than before.*

I not know what happened...

Everything seem so sad at first...bad humans keeping me as slave...me dying when finally escape after six years...then me come into wider world and find it not much better. I keep hearing that society is bad place...and that dragons cause much of the trouble...bad elders who hurt and corrupt hatchies and even each other...and bipeds who not much better, but toward dragons more than themselves...

How? How did world become so dark? Was world this bad when humans first summon aegis? I not can help but wonder how things might be different if none that ever happen...would world be better place or would something else, not aegis, had come into to world? Would dragons never have been split in two because of attitude toward bipeds? Would inside battles of humans not spill over into rest of world and not caused dragons to lose Great Sleeper? I feel I am beating around bush...past is past...nothing can do about it.

In recent days, I have saw such warm things...I have made many new friends and even was adopted by Zarla...I have family now...family and friends who love and care for me, just as I love and care for family and friends...

I not can ever forget that one fateful night at lake when mama so distraught over things in world that she wanted give up and join aegis and become enemy, but in end she came to senses and did stay. I not have loved mama any less for it, in fact I love mama even more because me saw that there still hope for future...I want that future. I want that future so much.

Word about new society that mama create is spreading. I have seen more people, dragon and biped both, come and see lake where new society will be, and if that not enough, I even saw mama play with Drysten in clearing today! I not think I would ever see that! Maybe mama will see that Drysten not bad and let me be friend with him now? I would like that lots!

Everything seem so much better than before. Is like someone flipped sunscope switch...is that right expression?...well more to point, things are much brighter than before. Let it stay that way, I not want things to return to the dark.

They say that it always darkest before dawn...I know that be true now. I did try and come up with own saying, it is "if it always darkest before dawn, then it always brightest during dawn".

Let's see if that true...

[Nyya]

*The text upon this page is written cleanly and carefully*

Hello again journal, it Talika again, but journal know that I think.

Not too much happen recently, but there one BIG happening! Mama Zarla and elder Vyridiun did becomes mates! I think that make Vyrry daddy and Iseia sister now! Happy day! I have full family now!

I think I will go and play with family. Journal not need worry, I will write more later, but right now, not whole lot to say. I happiest girl in world! I go play with family now! Bye bye!

[Nyya]

*The writing on this page is a little sloppy and in some places the words are spaced further apart than they should be*

Hello journal, it Talika again.

I did visit community clearing today. I was surprised to see place was so empty and peaceful. Only other one there was white shiny elder called Yukii. She and I talk. She seem nice, and I could not take eyes off her...almost dancing...glowing, and she was GLOW-ING. Not have seen such pretty light before. Yukii did let me under her wing, and she was almost warm as mama. I probably could have fall asleep if I stay under Shiny's wing too long.

...oh no...I feel sleep calling...but have more I want write...more I wa...-------------------------------------------------

*the writing ends there, with a nice long line going across the rest of the page*

[Nyya]

*The writing on this page is very stern and hard looking*

I...hate...stupid...fall...festival!!

Everyone is dress up like Aegis...have story time...and stories ALWAYS make me scared...I not like being scared! Why are living so stupid as think that dress up like Aegis and scare others is fun? IT NOT! IT STUPID! MIGHT AS WELL BE AEGIS FOR REAL!!

*There's some random scribbles here, almost as if Talika felt like getting some of her frustration out in the form of random scribbles in her journal. The entry eventually gets back to legible writing*

I did go to Dralk today with sister Iseia. Elders were having another story tell "event". I did see Greenflame there...he was much happy to see me. I was happy to see friend Greenflame too...I did miss him. Not know why, but he seem sad for some reason, but I think seeing me help him feel better...

Anyway...went to Dralk with sister for story time...and was not much different than story time leader Awdz had in community clearing. Elders were dress up like ghosties and when me did first see them me thought they were ghosties for real! They say it was just costume...but me was still nervous.

One story in particular really scared me! Elder Dorokane did tell story of poor hatchling who born in cave real close to Aegis Deadlands, so there was always lightning and thunder sounding in cave. Hatchling ventured into darkest parts of cave and found strange plant that ate him!! It was awful! However, what happen next was even worse...

Elders took us all to pool of lava and said Burnbones will appear if we toss hoard items into pool. I did toss Brass Urn into pool and did see ghost, not know if it Burnbones but thatnot what really scare me! Big giant pair of hands made of lava did burst from pool! Not know where *turn page*

[Nyya]

*This is a continuation from the previous page (post)*

...it come from but did scare me much! I did start seeing image of bad wraith who attack me in my mind again. Sister ran toward community lair in Dralk where she was attack by blighted dragon! I did panic and recall and run straight home and tell daddy! He said wait for him in cave by Moyo Lake and he return some time later with sister in his arms...

Sister not did look hurt, but she was crying. *A few tear drops cover this part of the entry* I did fall asleep huddled with daddy and sister. I did cry too until I did...

Not know how much later, but me did wake up and find daddy and mama holding me and sister close out by lake. Mama and daddy did say that me and sister not should leave lake area without their permission and someone need be with us to watch over us. They did say exactly what I was thinking.

Mama, daddy, and strange human named Dygath did tell me that me am strong and that me can overcome fear if me remember that me have family and friends who love me much. Dygath did place what he call "courage" rune on my wrist and Mama did something that make me feel real warm inside...

Not know what it is exactly. Mama said that part of mama's soul is inside me now and will protect me from bad stuff and give me comfort when me am lonely or sad...

Me am so glad to have such good family and friends. I not think I could ever be strong if me didn't...

[Nyya]

Hello Journal. I sorry I not have written for a while, much has been happening and it have been keeping me busy to much to write, but I have find time to let know what been happening lately.

First, me have grown stronger since last time me wrote. Trials on Lesser Aradoth have become obsolete save for most advanced ones. When me did tell mama that me did complete "First Hunt" of Sslanis and that me did kill Vekh all on me own, mama was very impressed and say me am now officially Huntress! That did make me very happy! I not will forget battle with Vekh. He was strong, but me was stronger! It did take everything me had to take Vekh down, but me was victorious in end. That is perhaps the most intense battle me have ever had in me life so far.

Second, me did finally learn that daddy is gifted, but sister iseia is not! That make me afraid! Not want to lose sister! Me did offer to give her my gift, but she not want it, not THAT way. Sister's logic was if me am gifted then she need not have to worry for me safety, or for daddy's safety since he is gifted too, which, me guess make sense...

...since sister not want me to lose gift for her sake, then me will continue to grow stronger and stronger. Me will become real strong like mama and daddy so that me can protect sister and others who not gifted. Me swear by Great Drulkar that me will become strong so can protect others who not can protect themselves from Aegis and their agents who operate outside Deadlands.

[Nyya]

*The writing on the page is a little scratchy and looks like it is written in haste, but it is still legible.*

HI JOURNAL! Me will be quick this time because mama say that she have BIG surprise for me today! She say me will be bonded with her! Not know what that mean but me am still super excited!

Not could sleep last night! Me am just too excited!

OOH! MAMA JUST WALK IN AND SAY IT IS TIME!

MUST GO NOW!

Will write again when bonding with mama done!

[Nyya]

Journal! Look and behold the new and improved Talika!

My gift from mama turn out to be special soul bonding with her. Using some special magics she got from...Shadina...i thinks...mama did take me into her womb where me spent several days in sleep. I not ever felt more warm and happy in my life.

Mama did say that because she did give birth to me, techniquely...or something...that I am now TOTALLY her hatchie! EEEEE! ME HAVE REAL CONNECTION WITH MAMA NOW!!

I feel deep connection with mama, even when she not with me. Another change is that my body has changed so that I walk on two legs now instead of four and I feel very strong fire deep inside. Learning to walk on two legs is harder than it look, but I have mama to teach me so I did learn quick!

I always wanted be just like mama...and now me really am! I am fiery biped dragon just like mama!

THANK YOU MAMA!! I LOVE YOU!!

[Nyya]

For most part things have been good past few days...

Daddy and sister Issy did just wake from their own special soul bond. Not know exactly what did happen with daddy's and sister's souls but now they are soul daddy and daughter just like I am soul daughter to mama. Also I did see that sister is biped dragon now, and sister and daddy have VERY pretty scales! HEEHEE!! DADDY HAVE SMOOTH PRETTY SCALES LIKE FEMALE!!

Daddy say that "pretty" is not word used to describe male, he say word is "handsome", but I say daddy is pretty!

Why not can males be called pretty? I not see what wrong with that, but anyway...me am rambling now

I think will stop here. I am tired much and need to sleep.

Night night Journal.

[Nyya]

*The text is very scratchy, almost like Talika didn't want to write it...*

...worst day...of my life...

...mama have been...trying to let me...be with...drysten...i thought...things looking up...but...i was...

...i was wrong...only got worse...so worse...

...mama and daddy...take me to place called...draak...say it only show...things not...always what appear...then...if things not could...get...any worse...i had to...make choice anyway...mama...or drysten...

...i did...finally realize...not could be...friends with drysten...long as he call...azu...friend...

...so...when did see him...last night...i did tell him...and then my day...which did already suck...became living nightmare...

...i did start to cry more than ever have...i did feel my heart...rip in two...felt dead inside...like i not wanted to live anymore...

...my fire...did completely overtake me...and i did begin to burn...whole body...on fire...pain was awful...

...wanted it gone...mama said give it to her...

...i did end up causing mama to die...

*the page here is charred pretty well..*

...it is all my fault...i did cause mama so much pain that she did die...and mama almost did not come back...i did truly lose her for a time...

...i think if not had been for daddy...shink...mintberry...auntie tsume...shadina...and falkor...

...i think without shink and mintberry summoning mama's body...and shadina not calling mama's torn spirit back from spirit world...and had we all not begged mama's torn spirit to come back...i...

...i would have lost mama forever...

...IT IS ALL MY FAULT...MAMA!! I'M SO SORRY!! I NEVER WANTED THIS TO HAPPEN!! EVERYTHING THAT DID HAPPEN TO MAMA LAST FEW DAYS ALL BECAUSE OF ME!!

...mama did choose to come back...but...still...mama almost was gone forever because of me...

...how can I ever forgive myself?

[Nyya]

*This entry is a follow-up to the previous one*

...this...pain inside...mama said it is because of powerful heart that my rebirthing did give to me...she is right...mama is always right...

...i do feel things so much more than others...mama said that is both good and bad...pain feels ten times worse...and...so does happiness...

...i not know...mama said she not can not be herself anymore...or Daughter and Queen will clash again and i will lose mama again...i want to be with mama...i want her to stay with me and never leave again...so after talking with mama...i understand now what must do...i must choose...i must choose mama who i love more than anything...or drysten...someone who seem nice and good but who chooses azu as his friend...

...if i choose mama...i lose drysten and can never be with him again...but mama would be happy...

...if i choose drysten...then mama would send me away to live with him...and i would never see mama again...

...my choice is obvious...

...last night did really open my eyes...after everything i did see at draak...after everything i felt last night and still feel now...

...the time has come to be a big girl and make my own choice...

...i choose mama...

...i will stay with mama forever...and i will break off all contact with drysten...

...i hope i can find the strength to tell him...maybe mama will let me borrow Queen...

...i am sorry drysten...this not is how i wanted it to end...i think you nice drake...but mama needs me...more now than ever...

...i will miss you drysten...

[Nyya]

Dear Journal...it is Talika again.

Things have been, pleasantly, good since that terrible night I almost did lose mama forever. She not have had another episode, and she seem to be feeling better. That is good. I do want mama to feel better and feel happy again...

Mama did say I not should blame myself for what happen to her that night. I am trying not to; it is hard, but I do trust mama. If I do ever start to have another meltdown of my own, and for any other problem I may have, mama will be first one I will go to for help.

On another note, it has now been more than a week since I have seen sister Iseia awake. I hope that everything is okay with sister and that sister is simply sleeping. I can only hope. I have seen daddy cuddling sister lots.

I remember that before daddy and mama fell in love and get together, that daddy and sister Iseia were like myself and mama...poor daddy...I hope he is okay...I should spend some more time with him. He has done so much for mama, myself, and sister...he is good drake and I am happy to call him daddy.

Well I need be getting to sleep now. It is late and I am tired.

Night night Journal.

[Nyya]

These past few days have been pretty peaceful.

Mama is doing good with learning how to play. She did show me game where she makes maple nuts fly in circles and i need to catch them...it harder than it sound...but mama's favorite game seem to be tickle attack! That is so much fun!

Not whole lots to say right now. I hope that things do stay this way for long time.

[Nyya]

There was interesting new development recently.

It turn out that minty's daddy and large scary group of elves are looking for him.

I first did see them down by lake but they not did see me. I did go and tell daddy who told me to stay in cave while he go and talk with them. I was scared...elves looked strong, and daddy only one dragon, he not could stand against such large group...

I did watch from cave, and though elves not did try and hurt daddy, I was still worried...

On another note, mama has been sleeping lots lately. When I do touch mama, she feel really exhausted inside, but otherwise good. I hope mama not doing same thing as sister...not have seen her awake for long time now...

I think that mama just need good rest...she has been through lots...yes, mama not hurt or anything, she just need good rest. I do hope that she is feeling not so tired when she wake and she and me can play together again.

In meantime, daddy did speak with me and he come up with idea to...ooh wait, I not even can say that here...mama like to see what I write in Journal sometimes...and I hers...so I will just say that I have been working on channeling the fire energy that burns brightly inside me. I am getting better at it, still can only manage basic fireball though, but with enough practice I will be just like biped fire mage, but with my primal essence mixed it...

hmm...I do wonder if I can combine my fire with mama's wind...now THAT would be cool! YEAH!! FIRESTORM!! We will burn and blow away whole legions of aegis with something like that!

Well, I guess that is all I have to say for now. Night night.