Since typing out that first rant was fun, and it was nice to make fun of stupid people in the retail places (primarily grocery stores, again, but lots of this could apply to department stores too), I'm going to do a Vol 2.

Why Customers Suck, Vol 2:

1). Leaving their Shopping Carts in the middle of the Aisle. Seriously, why do you people do this? I do not understand. Do you drive in the middle of the road? Do you park your car in the middle of the road? And then there are the people who do this, and then get all apologetic, "I'm sorry!" and then, 2 minutes later, I come by, and their cart is in the middle of the aisle again. 3 Minutes later, on another trip through the store while doing something, IT IS THERE AGAIN. OMG. Did you NOT learn from the last two times!? Honestly. And they keepg oing "OMG I'm sorry I'm in your way". Errr. Look, Lady.. just get that stupid thing the *beeeep* out of my way and stop standing there fumbling over yourself with 'I'm Sorry' and we'll both be much better off, thankyouverymuch.

2). Smaller Stores that do not have Cart Returns outside: Okay, so you decided to bring the shopping cart back into the store. That's good. We appreciate that, a lot. However... don't stand 3 feet away from where the carts go, and give a shove and walk out the door. Also, if you're at the register and the cart area is 5 feet away.... don't stand there and shove it across the floor, letting it roll wherever it pleases. This is a safety hazard, and it only takes 2-3 seconds to push the cart back in Properly. Don't be that lazy prick we always rant about. Take 2-3 seconds and push the *beeeep*ing thing back into the other carts, where it goes. If a 5 year old kid can do it, you can do it too. It doesn't take Ahnold to push those carts to where they dock with each other.

3). Speaking of kids... how about controlling your whining, yelling, screaming little brat devil-spawn of a child? I don't want to listen to the stupid thing wailing its lungs off all day. Seriously, do you let your child scream like that at home, too? No wonder you're deaf. Also, when there's a sign that says "Please do not let children climb or hang from rails" at the register... how about telling your kids to get the *beeep* off the rails. We would greatly appreciate that, thanks.

4). Cell Phones. Yeah, yeah, I know some of you people can't live _five freaking seconds_ without your ears glued to your cellphones, but when you are in the checkout line, hang the stupid thing up, or tell them to hold on. When I'm trying to tell you how much your order came to, or ask you whether you want that plastic card run as Credit or Debit (a lot of cards can do either), I need you to.. uh.. actually be paying attention. A lot of you people on cellphones, are so oblivious to your surroundings that I could easily punch in $50 instead of $5 and you'd never notice it until it was too late. Not that _I_ personally would ever want to do that, but you never know who would, if the cashier is some stranger you've never met before. One should always pay attention when managing money.

5). Boolean Answers to Non-Boolean Questions. If I ask you a question that is NOT Boolean (Yes/No, or True/False) I DON'T want a Boolean answer. For example, someone walks up to me and says "I want Marlboro Lights." I say "Kings or 100s?" (or "Box or Soft") and they go "Yeah". Um..... Kings or 100s? Don't give me "Yeah". I don't know what the *beep* that means. Answer the question already. Same with Credit or Debit. They hand me a plastic card. I see that it says VISA and "Debit" on it, I'm going to ask "Credit or Debit".... don't you DARE say "Yes" to me. I HATE that.

6). Rotation. To ensure that you get the best product, and to ensure that we don't lose any more money than absolutely necessary, we rotate our products, or at least we _should_, if the peons are doing their jobs correctly. Everyone knows this. We rotate for a reason, people. Yes, yes, we know you want the freshest stuff, but please don't dig the whole shelf worth of goods off the shelf, grab the newest you can find and then just throw it all on there (some people leave it laying wherever!). Just... grab the first one on the end. We highly appreciate it. Yes, it is not as fresh as the one in the back.

In a blind taste test, I bet you $10 you wouldn't notice the difference between Milk dated 10 days from now vs Milk dated 12 days from now. And if you can't finish a gallon of milk in 10 days, then buy a half gallon instead. Those of you people who dig for stuff, especially milk, run the risk of dropping one, and spilling it, or, if too many people do it, the milk goes out dated and we eat half of the cost of that. The milk company gives us _credit_ on that, sure. But it is not 100% credit IIRC, and we DO lose money on that. Where do you think the store is going to recover those losses? Yup, higher prices. If too many out-dated goods get sent back, and we lose too much money, we need to raise prices to compensate. Now is some imagined Freshness worth paying higher prices? Just grab the one in the front (as long as it is within reason). If milk is dated 10 days from now, don't dig for something dated 12 days for now. The 10-day one is fine. Just take it.